What is temper tantrums
Temper tantrums are an intense overflow and physical release of a child’s negative emotions, often involving crying, throwing things around, disruptive behaviour, kicking and screaming. It is often associated with children aged 1 to 4 years. There are normal aspects of a child’s development; as the child grows, particularly around the age of 4, tantrums tend to occur less frequently because the child becomes better able to communicate their needs and desires.
What causes toddlers temper tantrum?
Desire independency. Toddlers are always curious; they always want to explore everything within their environment. When their carer blocks them, it triggers tantrums. They start to cry and scream or throw things because they still want to invade that space, which they were blocked from.
Growth. Tantrums are a normal part of every toddler’s developmental phase; therefore, the continuous exploration and self-learning can be straining and lead to tantrums.
They feel neglected. When toddlers feel ignored, they cry for toys and food to get attention, especially when other toddlers are around.
How long do toddlers tantrums usually last?
Research shows that it is common for a child to experience a tantrum once a day, typically lasting up to 15 minutes. Temper tantrums are most common in children aged 30-36 months, with 91% displaying them, while 87% of children aged 18-30 months also experience tantrums; this prevalence decreases to 59% by the time they reach 42-48 months.
According to Caroline P. Hoyrick, preschool children ages 3–5 (83.7%) exhibit tantrum behaviour infrequently, while others (8.6%) display it daily. 20% of kids at the age of 2 years experience tantrums at least once a day, while 18% of 3-year-olds experience them.
Depending on the child, it is difficult to rule out how long they last, but research has ruled out that 75% of kids have tantrums lasting for about 3 minutes to 5 minutes for the ages of 1 to 4 years.
How to stop or prevent temper tantrum
You can reduce toddler tantrums with proven methods. In this section, I will share some ways that can help you reduce the possibility of tantrums based on age groups. Remember, tantrums are a normal part of a child’s development. ‘Normal’ doesn’t mean there is something wrong with your child.
Teach your child emotional language.
Toddlers have their emotions and brain capacity still developing; they can’t express how they are feeling inside. Since they can’t express their feelings, a tantrum becomes their mouthpiece to express themselves.
When your child throws food, screams, or acts violently, just remember that it’s part of their development and try to stay calm. Then you have to teach our child how to communicate how they are feeling. For example, in the event that they experience a tantrum, you might say to them, ‘Ooh, hey, big little one, I can see something has got you frustrated. Don’t worry, Mum and Daddy will deal with it. The waiter got you upset.’
Avoid dismissing what seems minor to you.
What appears insignificant to you could hold significant importance for your child. To avoid losing what your children consider valuable, parents should not judge their children’s realities based on their experiences. The little stick they chose to keep near the television holds significant value to them.
It is important that as a parent you take everything that your child plays with extra seriously. If your child becomes upset about losing their stick, you could gently say to them, ‘I feel like a terrible person for losing your stick. I wasn’t aware that you were using it. “Do you want a new one? It can be bigger or smaller than the one you had.”
Support them as they express their feelings.
I know I might sound cringey, but as a parent, you should show empathy to your child by acknowledging that there will be difficult days and offering encouraging words that might help uplift their spirits. Maybe you can give them a gift that reflects their interests or personality. Ensure your child is in a safe environment. Learn how to use gentle parenting to nurture your child’s feelings.
Offer them guidance and support.
Make it a goal to calm your child down, show them love, and appreciate how good their behaviour has been. Guide them patiently on what they should do next time should the feeling arise. You never know; a hug might change your child’s situation.
Maintain regular meal times.
Having meals, paps, and bedtime prepared and maintaining the same daily schedule can help eliminate tantrums in your child.